Mrs. Yonkers, the computer teacher, is the nerdiest teacher in the history of the world. She can type with her feet! She buys foam cheeseheads off eBay! She even puts a Webcam on a turtle! Is she trying to take over the planet?

A computer in my head -- Say good-bye to sugar -- Emily is a giant hamster -- Sharpening pencils can be dangerous -- Sugar shock -- Computers can't tell jokes -- Busted! -- Virtual Reality Day -- The truth about Mrs. Yonkers -- The greatest invention in the history of the world -- Send in the clones -- One way to handle a sub -- The moral of the story.